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  #771  
Old 11-11-2017, 03:28 PM
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aerie aerie is offline
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"Do not protect yourself by a fence, but rather by your friends."
Czech Proverb


gvkm on 2009-06-17 20:36:28
mY GIRLFRIEND SAYS I'M STUPID

bansaisequoia on 2010-10-27 00:58:47
So dump her.

bansaisequoia on 2011-04-09 18:38:42
Or admit she's right.

cknapp329 on 2011-07-14 12:36:49
or build a fence around her

FaerieWings on 2015-07-11 13:59:54
LOL @cknapp

JJ20paws on 2016-10-28 11:32:49
A sturdy wall (with moat?) works too

abra on 2016-12-19 10:02:51
Oh, it's all so long ago, but I do wonder what gvkm did about the girlfriend who said h was stupid.

maradnu on 2017-06-24 14:52:02
If she was right, he may still be with her.
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  #772  
Old 11-16-2017, 02:25 PM
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montyb montyb is offline
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"The busiest of living agents are certain dead men's thoughts. "
Christian Nestell Bovee

LLapp on 2016-11-11 15:23:20
Sometimes racing thoughts keep me from sleeping, but I never imagined that dead people had the same problem.

IlLatino on 2016-12-25 03:27:35
Apparently it's harder to stay dead than to get that way.
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  #773  
Old 11-18-2017, 10:21 PM
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LLapp LLapp is online now
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Default Carlyle, dogs, and mowers

"If you do not wish a man to do a thing, you had better get him to talk about it; for the more men talk, the more likely they are to do nothing else." Thomas Carlyle

montyb on 2012-04-23 14:21:00
Anyone care to discuss this? I have work to avoid.

WRQ9 on 2013-07-22 19:47:13
Lawn mowing is a sort of a collective bonsai tradition, requiring little skill, and plenty of gasoline.

montyb on 2013-09-22 11:27:04
At one time my sister owned four dogs. Mowing her backyard required lots of skillful foot work.

Quizzical on 2015-02-18 14:02:32
What was at one time a lawn mower becomes a fertilizer spreader.

darkyr on 2017-01-27 16:34:30
I have just the one, but from the looks of it when I mow, I would swear he is inviting the neighbor dogs over.

montyb on 2017-06-15 09:11:04
I learned the Fox Trot while mowing.
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  #774  
Old 11-19-2017, 04:21 AM
oddcouple oddcouple is online now
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How a person masters his fate is more important than what his fate is."
Wilhelm von Humboldt

Lily H on 2015-07-08 17:44:31
LOL! What was I thinking? I had date instead of fate, although it's funnier that way.

montyb on 2016-04-11 10:46:45
I also was mastering my date.

abra on 2016-09-27 08:15:46
As long as your date isn't mastering you.

LLapp on 2017-04-05 12:24:28
For a second I had "masters his cats."

wigoddess on 2017-05-07 07:57:26
LOL... meow!

oddcouple on 2017-09-21 20:27:51
I don't know how anyone could master a cat.
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  #775  
Old 11-20-2017, 11:49 AM
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montyb montyb is offline
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Default I cannot believe where this one went!

"It is in the treatment of trifles that a person shows what they are. "
Arthur Schopenhauer

montyb on 2012-03-17 01:25:57
The trifles or the person?

puzzleme on 2013-05-07 12:59:02
Don't trifle with us, monty.

Allen on 2013-07-06 12:45:35
You say trifles, I say truffles. Let's call the whole thing off!

Quizzical on 2014-03-15 10:22:04
From the construction of the verb tense and the plural "they", it would indicate the trifles. I don't think that is what Artie had in mind. An please, someone, get him an aspirin.

ulua on 2014-04-15 02:43:23
Yum, I love a nice chocolate toffee trifle

macmilh on 2014-12-18 02:15:59
Quizzical - an aspirin is a cure for trifles?

Quizzical on 2015-01-09 03:41:08
Maybe the trifles gave him a headache. Chocolate can do that.

kb83 on 2015-06-08 04:17:46
Great comments!

tgreen517 on 2016-04-17 07:19:48
For some reason i am hungry now.

maradnu on 2016-08-18 15:58:29
Who are you calling a triple?

autumngirl on 2017-04-10 15:44:40
a head like that outta hurt!!

Roxanne on 2017-04-13 03:43:34
It's not a headache, it's shame. What he really means to say is "I m-m-made you a stwawbewwy twifle, an', an' a lemon twifle, for your birfday, but I eated dem. Bofe. Sowwy."
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  #776  
Old Yesterday, 04:29 AM
oddcouple oddcouple is online now
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"The war between being and nothingness is the underlying illness of the twentieth century. Boredom slays more of existence than war."
Norman Mailer

montyb on 2012-08-10 23:46:03
Geez, talk about self-promotion for his novels.

JD_1947 on 2014-11-06 14:34:50
I am bored occasionally. Now being one of those times . . .

RustySkipper on 2015-04-26 05:03:45
When you're bored, get a plank.

darkyr on 2017-08-11 04:43:37
And if you're still bored after that, get hammered.

Queethebean on 2017-09-25 10:55:29
You nailed that pun.

MamaB on 2017-10-24 10:51:08
My husband is a punner. And now ya'll. I'm screwed!
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  #777  
Old Yesterday, 05:03 AM
oddcouple oddcouple is online now
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"Success is failure turned inside out. "
Unattributed

BCraig on 2013-03-14 22:49:19
You spelled "Karl Weick" as "Carl".

abra on 2014-01-26 14:02:15
HUH?

LLapp on 2016-03-28 15:01:03
I did not!

maradnu on 2016-11-29 15:15:41
This is almost as useless as a Robert Brault quote

Persephone59 on 2017-07-16 11:56:20
This is just stupid. It is more useless than Brault, and not funny like at least some of Handey's quotes are.
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  #778  
Old Today, 12:11 AM
Persephone59 Persephone59 is online now
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I only master my cats for minutes at a time, when I have to toss them into the powder room to go in and out of the house. (Indoor cats).
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